Showing posts with label Usama bin Laden. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Usama bin Laden. Show all posts

Monday, May 9, 2011

A little sympathy, maybe?

I’ve been reading a lot recently about Usama bin Laden, and strange as it sounds to say, I feel a bit of pity for him.


No really, think about it: The guy was 54 years old, had 3 wives at the same time and 23 kids. At that age it would be difficult for him to change careers. He was pretty much stuck in his current line of work. He lived in a million dollar house, but I think he got ripped off by a really sleazy Realtor. I mean, a million bucks for that dump?? That right there would send me over the edge.


And his home life must have been hell, too. I can hear it now.....


Wife #1: “Usama, honey.....does this burkha make my butt look big?”


Wife #2: “Sweetie...how come you bought #3 a new goat last week, but you didn’t get me one? Don’t you still love me? I mean, we never go out anymore....we need to talk.”


Wife #3: “Listen here, buster. I pick up after you, I cook all day, I try and keep our 23 kids in line....DO YOU HEAR ME...23 FOR ALLAH’S SAKE! And what do you do all day, Mr. Big Shot? You just sit there in the floor, wrapped up nice and cozy in your old army blanket, cleaning your gun, watching yourself on TV. Must be nice!” *snarl*


Wife #1: So have you decided which of us you’ll be taking to the Terrorist Ball next month?”


I can see why he might want to vent every once in a while. You know, pop off a few AK-47 rounds, maybe blow up a continent or something. Oh well, at least he now has his 72 Virginians.


S

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

A terrible thought.....

So we finally got Usama bin Laden. Wonderful news! But we interred his body at sea, and all we have now are photos and some DNA, which we used to "definitively" identify him.

But appearance-wise he looks to me a lot like that guy from the Oakridge Boys they let go, or maybe a member of ZZTop. Are we sure they're all accounted for?

And is Pakistan/Yemen/Saudi Arabia, etc. like Arkansas? I mean does EVERYONE there have the same DNA?

Hmmmmm.

S